Our move has proved a nightmare with no disabled features to the house like wide doors or wheelchair ramp, a low toilet I have to be transferred onto by a trained carer, plus weeks without internet. My desktop is still in storage as no office imminent, so I’m writing this one-fingered on a laptop barely in reach.
And the new wheelchair keeps dying on me at inconvenient moments.
The flash-drive with my current novel went AWOL during the move, and other backups are proving elusive.
My health is suffering and paying for carers will cripple us… unless my brother acts out of character.
However, I must reassure the Ninja Captain, Alex J. Cavanaugh that this announcement is not ‘ffarwel’.
Anyway IWSG.Remember, the question is optional!
July 6 question – If you could live in any book world, which one would you choose?
A few come to mind from Narnia to Earthsea to a galaxy far, far away. But as Tolkien is my early writing inspiration, I choose Middle Earth… well, a safer region, The Shire.
Is that my yearning for rural England on which The Shire was modelled? Home?
Except my heart is in North Wales, where my Sparkle stories are set. Can I live there, please?
+++
Finally, don’t forget to visit more active writers via the IWSG site:
Time for the monthly Insecure Writer’s Support Group post and an update on my situation… although this is written and scheduled a week in advance.
My health issues are worse as I’m still struggling to stay comfortable in my powered wheelchair… and I can’t sit at my desk long enough to get much writing done.
The new wheelchair from Malaysia arrived but won’t work in our current office. So, it’s in store until we move… in a week or so as I write.
The relocation became more chaotic and stressful as our planned move to one trailer park kept being delayed. Frustratingly, the new trailer failed to be delivered = months of waiting. But we’ve sold our house. Completion on July 1st, unless we pay $8,500 to stay on a month.
Ridiculous. So, we found a refurbished trailer for sale in another park, where one of my wife’s sons lives with his family. Fortunately, we were able to pay cash from our sale proceeds and we move in around June 1st… with a month to clear our vacated home, which the buyers are refurbishing.
Hence this June IWSG post is rushed, and July’s might be scrubbed unless we get the new office set up.
But I should manage to do the June WEP/IWSG Challenge as I’m aiming to write and schedule before moving, body willing.
As the question is optional, I’m tempted to answer… briefly.
June 1 question – When the going gets tough writing the story, how do you keep yourself writing to the end? If have not started the writing yet, why do you think that is and what do you think could help you find your groove and start?
I must be repetitive and ask you to agree these guys are the best. Why not? Well, they are – especially as they all have concerns, fears, and insecurities. But they struggle on, so ticker-tape applause for all of them – plus toasts with the best brew available.
Purpose of IWSG: To share and encourage. Writers can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds!
Every month, we announce a question that members can answer in their IWSG post. These questions may prompt you to share advice, insight, a personal experience or story. Include your answer to the question in your IWSG post or let it inspire your post if you are struggling with something to say.
Posting: The first Wednesday of every month is officially Insecure Writer’s Support Group day. Post your thoughts on your own blog. Talk about your doubts and the fears you you have conquered. Discuss your struggles and triumphs. Offer a word of encouragement for others who are struggling. Visit others in the group and connect with your fellow writer – aim for a dozen new people each time – and return comments. This group is all about connecting!
Let’s rock the neurotic writing world!
Our Twitter handle is @TheIWSG and hashtag is #IWSG.
Every month, we announce a question that members can answer in their IWSG post. These questions may prompt you to share advice, insight, a personal experience, or story. Include your answer to the question in your IWSG post or let it inspire your post if you are struggling with something.
For more on the IWSG monthly post and links to other participants visit:
I was about to pass on this month’s Insecure Writer’s Support Group post due to fallout from my health issues – the MonSter, known medically as multiple sclerosis. However, the monthly question made me hesitate, so please bear with my confused thoughts.
Okay, here goes.
Well, first I must thank the Ninja Captain, Alex J. Cavanaugh for all he does – and thanks for creating the Insecure Writer’s Support Group without whom my writing would be non-existent…and March’s post might have been ‘farewell’.
Second, my thanks to all those whose encouraging comments ensure I scribble onwards.
Anyway, don’t forget to visit real writers via the IWSG site, and for better answers to this month’s challenging question.
Although the question is optional, I’m again tempted to answer.
July 7 question – What would make you quit writing?
Quit writing? Why?
Despite my health, my brain keeps delving and devising. I have enough unfinished projects and first drafts to keep my writing-self distracted for years. Like my alternative history surrounding the Viking Age, I’m watching TV shows – ‘The Last Kingdom’ and ‘Vikings’ – which keep me thinking ‘what if’.
And I’m listening to an excellent series of audiobooks – the Fiona Griffiths Welsh detective series by Harry Bingham – which ensures my Welsh detectives, Sparkle Anwyl and Kama Pillai keep getting attention.
However, my hands don’t always co-operate, nor does my voice – I’m fading slowly.
So, the answer may be ‘I’ll quit when I fail to get my jumbled thoughts out on paper/screen/whatever’. Or die with my notebook open.
Until then, I’ll keep scribbling.
Additional Thoughts
When devising the title of this post, I had the phrase ‘It’s better to burn out than to fade away’ in mind, and a scene from Highlander. While searching for a clip, I found the true origin as well, which was buried in my memory.
So, first here’s Neil Young with the original version – My My, Hey Hey (Out of the Blue)
And here’s Neil Young & Crazy Horse with the other track with that phrase. The two tracks bookended the same album. Anyway, here’s – Hey Hey, My My ( Into the Black ) live performance in 1991.
Plus, here’s the scene from Highlander, with the quote coming at the end.
How can I be repetitive asking you to agree these guys are the best? Well, they are – especially as they all have concerns, fears, and insecurities. But they struggle on, so ticker-tape applause for all of them – plus toasts with the best brew available.
Purpose of IWSG: To share and encourage. Writers can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds!
Every month, we announce a question that members can answer in their IWSG post. These questions may prompt you to share advice, insight, a personal experience or story. Include your answer to the question in your IWSG post or let it inspire your post if you are struggling with something to say.
Posting: The first Wednesday of every month is officially Insecure Writer’s Support Group day. Post your thoughts on your own blog. Talk about your doubts and the fears you you have conquered. Discuss your struggles and triumphs. Offer a word of encouragement for others who are struggling. Visit others in the group and connect with your fellow writer – aim for a dozen new people each time – and return comments. This group is all about connecting!
Let’s rock the neurotic writing world!
Our Twitter handle is @TheIWSG and hashtag is #IWSG.
Every month, we announce a question that members can answer in their IWSG post. These questions may prompt you to share advice, insight, a personal experience, or story. Include your answer to the question in your IWSG post or let it inspire your post if you are struggling with something.
For more on the IWSG monthly post and links to other participants visit:
I finally got my entry for the 2019
Annual IWSG Anthology Contest in with a day
to spare. Finally, I suppressed my fears, switched off my urge to edit, edit,
edit, and edit forever. I managed to integrate almost all the comments from my wonderful
beta readers. However, my step kids were no shows as readers. But I had an
awesome MG kid-reader from the UK – thanks Rebecca, for some awesome
suggestions.
Insecurity postponed until the results
appear next year.
Now, I’m stressing about my Pitch Wars 2019 submission – Fevered Few. The required query letter, one-page synopsis, and the first chapter of my completed manuscript are achievable by the September 25th-27th deadline. But I’m unsure if I have a “completed and polished full-length, fiction manuscript”. Complete perhaps, but ‘dusted’ might fit better than ‘polished’.
So, another insecure month. Or maybe, I’ll
work on my short stories and the drug cartel in Bolivia.
Anyway, on to the IWSG monthly question.
September 4
question – If you could pick one place in the world to sit and write your next
story, where would it be and why?
I’m writing this in an office shared with my
wife, that overlooks a suburban US street – not my dream location.
Requirements for change:
Water view: by a river would be good or
overlooking a beach or ocean.
Mountain view: looking out onto green alpine
meadows or something with a snow cap.
Log cabin: a feel of being in the woods, surrounded
by trees.
In my mind, I see a cabin on Crater Lake
in Oregon, USA. We once looked at murals to create some of that on the wall
behind/beside our desks. Sound effects? We were planning to move to a mobile home
park with houses overlooking a lake – but that’s not happening.
Of course, our house and office
in North Wales was on the edge of woodland, overlooked Ceredigion Bay, and had
a view of Snowdon. Plus, we had jackdaws in our garden. Just try ignoring our
neighbours-from-Hell.
My wife’s photo may not show the estuary or the tip of Harlech Castle, but we could see them, especially from our landscaped garden. But the memories are there – and inspire my writing about Detective Sparkle Anwyl of the North Wales Police/Heddlu Gogledd Cymru in my Snowdon Shadows series.
And that photo has been enlarged,
so it hangs above my desk with a red Welsh Dragon in front. Outside the window,
beside our new rose garden, is a fountain of running water. Good enough for the
next story, especially as we are spending the last weekend of September in a
cabin in the mountains surrounded by pine trees.
(I so admire these
guys as I know they have commitments too. Ticker-tape applause.)
Purpose of IWSG: To share and encourage. Writers
can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak.
Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a
safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds!
Every month, we announce a question that members can answer
in their IWSG post. These questions may prompt you to share advice, insight, a
personal experience or story. Include your answer to the question in your IWSG
post or let it inspire your post if you are struggling with something to say.
Posting: The first Wednesday of every month is
officially Insecure Writer’s Support Group day. Post your
thoughts on your own blog. Talk about your doubts and the fears you you
have conquered. Discuss your struggles and triumphs. Offer a word of
encouragement for others who are struggling. Visit others in the group and
connect with your fellow writer – aim for a dozen new people each time – and
return comments. This group is all about connecting!
Let’s rock the neurotic writing world!
Our Twitter handle is @TheIWSG and hashtag is #IWSG.
Every month, we announce a question that members can answer
in their IWSG post. These questions may prompt you to share advice, insight, a
personal experience or story. Include your answer to the question in your IWSG
post or let it inspire your post if you are struggling with something to
say.
Guilty as my writing in July continued to be minimal: a few
book reviews and the first draft for my August #WEP/IWSG CHALLENGE – due a
fortnight (two weeks) today. Meanwhile, Sparkle Anwyl has taken a holiday in my
head. And I’m still wading through a backlog of emails that fills up like
sand. Or is it my gaming distractions or
my health?
Rabbit
holes – like researching hashtags that describe me: #IWSG #WEP/IWSG #crimefiction #ubisoftgames #assassinscreed #gamer #bookworm
#goodreads #MS. Those were for #PWPoePrompts.
My biggest concern is my entry for the 2019
Annual IWSG Anthology Contest. I’ve done most of the research, but
some key bits are missing. I’ve outlined my story but I’ve yet to finish the
first draft. Finally, I fear I need more than beta readers that know MG. The
deadline looms – September 4th. Panic is setting in.
Beta readers. I keep losing them. I
even need some to help get ‘Azure Spark’ ready for pro-editing. Are my
own critiques frightening writers/readers away?
The brutal truth. Can anyone help me, please?
Anyway, on to the IWSG monthly question.
August 7 question
– Has your writing ever taken you by surprise? For example, a positive and
belated response to a submission you’d forgotten about or an ending you never
saw coming?
I can’t claim any ‘industry’ surprises. But that’s not
surprising given my lack of productivity. A few expected rejections, a few
years ago. One hoped for acceptance – my debut novel, Spiral of Hooves.
But unsurprising low sales and mixed reviews.
However, there was one surprise while writing Spiral of
Hooves – the identity of the antagonist. S/he changed as I edited the early
drafts and focused the story – as did her/his motive.
In one of my current WIPs, part of the Snowdon Shadows
series, one of my favourite characters became an unexpected victim – but with a
twist. Where did that come from?
There must be a devious person at work in my mind. Who is
it? Why did I create a link back to my unrelated debut? A character in the WIP
series appeared after playing a minor role in Spiral of Hooves. Who was more
surprised? Me or Sparkle?
(I so admire these
guys as I know they have commitments too. Ticker-tape applause.)
Purpose of IWSG: To share and encourage. Writers
can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak.
Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a
safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds!
Every month, we announce a question that members can answer
in their IWSG post. These questions may prompt you to share advice, insight, a
personal experience or story. Include your answer to the question in your IWSG
post or let it inspire your post if you are struggling with something to say.
Posting: The first Wednesday of every month is
officially Insecure Writer’s Support Group day. Post your
thoughts on your own blog. Talk about your doubts and the fears you you
have conquered. Discuss your struggles and triumphs. Offer a word of
encouragement for others who are struggling. Visit others in the group and
connect with your fellow writer – aim for a dozen new people each time – and return
comments. This group is all about connecting!
Let’s rock the neurotic writing world!
Our Twitter handle is @TheIWSG and hashtag is #IWSG.
Every month, we announce a question that members can answer
in their IWSG post. These questions may prompt you to share advice, insight, a
personal experience or story. Include your answer to the question in your IWSG
post or let it inspire your post if you are struggling with something to
say.
Thursday May 30th, 2019, marks World
MS Day, an opportunity for the global community to come together,
share stories, and increase awareness about what living with multiple sclerosis
(MS) is really like.
The sun is shining, and I can see blue sky outside, so let’s
start with the positives.
I might have retired early but now have time to write more
fiction – and at my own speed. Fewer deadlines mean less stress.
I get to spend more time with my wife, our dogs and cats, and
with my stepfamily. Some family even help us around the house and garden.
My MS symptoms are sporadic and, in some ways, less severe
than for others with MS or other chronic diseases. Much of the time, I can
ignore them and attempt to get a few things done – like writing and chilling.
I can stay up late – playing computer games – and stay in
bed without having to go to work. My schedule and not some magazine’s or
newspaper’s.
Relaxation
However, I can’t ignore the invisible nature of MS – even if
many do. I’m in a wheelchair so no longer invisible – just an obstacle blocking
the aisle or sidewalk. But I wish people would realise my brain still works –
well, most of the time but in weird ways.
MS creates a brain fog. I struggle with thoughts, finding my
words – lost or jumbled. Thinking can be as hit or miss as writing or speaking.
I stumble through this confusion and fall often.
Falling is a fear extending to the physical. When I walked,
I stumbled and fell. Now, when I transfer to and from my wheelchair, the danger
has changed – somewhat. I still hit the floor hard though. And my wife can’t
pick me up so has to call for help.
Is the MS my fault? The truth is none of us sufferers have
MS because of some bad habit or poor lifestyle choice. Some things might
trigger symptoms – like stress or noise – but there is no known cause. This strikes
many different people with varying lifestyles.
I ate organic vegetarian food mostly, didn’t smoke, or drink
often. My work wasn’t more stressful than some. But my health dice came up with
MS – and leukaemia.
Meeting others with MS, or reading about them, made me
realise our symptoms can differ – hence the ‘multiple’. The course of the
disease, the speed and the intensity vary. So, our treatments are as diverse as
our symptoms.
Symptoms are chronic, debilitating, and so much more intense
than others understand. Fatigue strikes fast and not always when I plan to nap.
This is not tired in the normal sense.
My emotions flare as well. I get angry over stupid things,
from emails to computer games. And the tears flow with regular ease – from pleasure,
frustration, from sadness. Intense noise grates, like dogs barking or kids
screaming. Sensory overload is a daily hazard.
My internal thermostat is faulty. Most of the time I’m cold
but I can overheat, especially in warm, muggy weather. Damp or humid weather don’t
suit – even if I miss wet Wales. The sea breeze there dispelled the dampness.
The medical approach to MS, especially here in the US, leans
heavily towards keeping the pharmaceutical companies in business, rather than a
cure. Disease modifiers – not that I got those with the NHS postcode lottery –
are the norm. But there isn’t an acceptable one for my secondary progressive MS.
Under neither system was medical marijuana an option for me – well, not legally
in Idaho.
But the medical research has brought benefits and relief to
many. Those newly diagnosed have choices I didn’t. There is hope out there.
However, people still believe MS is a death sentence – it is
not. We are perhaps vulnerable to other conditions as our immune system is
compromised. That doesn’t mean MS will kill me. So, don’t count on inheriting
yet, brother.
But it is a life sentence. Emphasis on LIFE! The
inspirational people with MS tell me “there’s a lot of it to be lived after
diagnosis”. I have plans and things to do – like publish the Snowdon Shadows
series; and that’s four books and ideas churning.
Whatever condition gets rolled for us, we are warriors and life
is precious so worth fighting for.
The Multiple
Sclerosis International Federation (MSIF) is encouraging
family members, caregivers, and patients affected by multiple sclerosis to
participate in World MS Day today.
Each year, MSIF, which now includes dozens of MS organizations worldwide,
launches a campaign focused on a different theme to mark the day. This year’s
theme is Visibility. Called “My
Invisible MS” (#MyInvisibleMS),
the 2019 campaign is geared toward raising awareness of the invisible symptoms of
MS, and their hidden impact on the quality
of life of MS patients, their family members, and caregivers.
Writing Wings 